in the flowers

i don't know where my feelings are today
i think i should get married today
i will sequester all the serotonin
into this one finger
then i'll find my soul
i'll say hello
and then leave it somewhere in the flowers somewhere somewhere

"to hold you in time
to hold you in time
to hold you in time
to hold you in time"

I embrace the surge of the unreal. lack of feelings disassociates me with the unreal. I am outside myself, interacting with society. I am banished from my inner world. I am whatever

"If I could just leave my body for the night"

I'm doing this thing where i look at myself in the mirror while I write. It is disturbing. I don't understand my reflection. I don't understand how I have a body. I don't understand what I look like.

am i high right now
seems like it


love you

i'm gonna write a love story or love poem or love prosey shit poem (that is prose enjambed in brown and green font, i think).

I'm trying to come to some great discovery, that i am talented. that i am a genius. i'm trying to shock myself. i'm trying to find a tub of confidence. i'm drinking more often.

the first word of my love prosey shit poem will be:

the first punctuation mark of my love prosey shit poem will be:

I'm going to incorporate some lines from John Ashberry's poem Girls on the Run:
"Dream lover, won't you come to me?
Dream lover, won't you be my darling?
It's not too late or too early."

I will get this published some day. mark my words. shut up. shut the hell up. It'll be published, in one form or another, and then i'll be the one laughing at you for doubting me, but it won't matter to you because you won't know me, I'll just be a crazy person laughing deliriously on the street, and you'll be with your husband or wife and you'll mistake me for a bum and chuck coins at me or pretend you're really distracted with something else.


in 2080 i'll surely be dead

this is by far the best take away show i've seen


their a capella puts fleet foxes to shame.

"i'm so blessed to have spent the time with my family and the friends i love in my short life i have met so many people i deeply care for"


i don't have a Fbook to tell everyone i don't care about how excited i am

i'm a loser or something
so why don't you kill me

avant / garde

i'm gonna get drunk and high tonight and listen to bob dylan and not go to school tomorrow

I'm drunk and high
right now
and listening to
bob dylan and
going to school

with mixed emotions (between love and affection),

Peter Walsh


the f word or whatever

you are so small
and you are hiding inside
spying from a slanted window
hounds are stirring in your heart
but you are so tired
and you will always be tired